The Blue Potholder

At one point in time, I changed careers from accounting and management to teaching. After two years at grad school to study education and language acquisition, I became a licensed ELL (English Language Learner) teacher. Although licensed K-12, over the six years I was in the field, I taught all elementary grades from Kindergarten to 5th grade, and truly enjoyed lesson planning, teaching, and the students.

I loved the students I had over the years who were from many different countries and spoke different languages: Russian, French, Spanish, British English, and Farsi. One year, a particular student stood out to me. Her name was Sophia*.

Sophia was always very quiet and didn't say much to me or her peers. She always tried her best, did as she was instructed, and was always respectful. Neither I nor her classroom teacher had any issues with her behavior or school work. Whenever I had her on my schedule, I would always try to talk to her as I did with all the students, but would not get much of a response. I also noticed that sometimes she would wear the same clothing items a few times within one week. It didn't matter to me but I just wondered...

I had not met either of her parents at any school open houses nor received any requests for parent-teacher conferences on teacher workdays. Then came the day of her regular classroom Christmas party. Many times, when students have field trips or classroom parties, specialty teachers like myself and others do not pull them out for teaching, but join them in the classroom. I had other students in her classroom as well, so I made the rounds visiting each one including Sophia.

Sophia quietly pulled out a small package from her desk, handed it to me, and said it was from her mom. It was not wrapped in Christmas wrapping paper. No bows. No ribbon. She wanted me to open it right then and there, so I did. Inside, I found a beautiful blue crocheted rectangle about 7" x 9". I couldn't figure out what it was for. Perhaps a potholder?

What Sophia said next I will never forget. She said, "My mom made it just for you. She said to tell you thank you. We don't have a lot of money, but she bought some yarn and made it." It was all I could do to hold back the tears! Here was a family just starting out in this country, most likely working low-paying jobs, but working hard to provide for themselves. Money was probably tight. Yet, her mom spent money on the yarn, and spent the time to crochet it for me. I thanked Sophia and told her how beautiful it was and to thank her mom for me. 

Besides cute, hand-made gifts from our sons when they were little, and now heartfelt words on cards from them as adults, I had never received a gift with the story behind it that touched my heart so deeply!

I still have this potholder in a kitchen drawer. Each year in December when I pull out Christmas kitchen towels from that drawer, I think of Sophia. She must be an adult now and I wonder where she is and what she is doing.  I think of her mom whom I eventually met--a lovely, gentle lady with a beautiful, thankful heart.

That was a meaningful gift that greatly touched my heart, but there was another gift that was given to me long before I was born that changed my life in my 20's. In fact, that gift was for ALL of humankind. All around the world, people celebrate Christmas on December 25. Whether they understand it or not, Christmas is the celebration of Jesus's birth.

He was 100% human and 100% God. Human so that He could experience and identify with all that humans go through, yet He did not sin. It was His great unconditional love for us that caused Him to sacrifice His life on the cross for all of our sins so that we can have eternal life with Him. Sin is simply missing the mark, not meeting up to God's standards. Since He was also 100% God, He rose from the dead after three days.

Do you know Jesus? Do you have a personal relationship with Him? Do you have joy or know the purpose of your existence? If the answer is "no" and you would like to but don't know how, please feel free to send me a direct message. I was in your exact space once.

John 3:16 For God so loved the world, that He gave His one and only Son that whoever believes in Him will not perish but have eternal life. 

*Name has been changed to protect the identity of the student.

Ragweeds or Marigolds?

Last year, we planted some marigolds along a walkway in front of our house. They are one of the few flowers we can plant that the deer do not eat. They did so well and lasted long into the fall season. 

Earlier this spring as plants and flowers started to protrude from the ground, my husband and I noticed some plants came up in the exact spots where we planted last year's marigolds. It was not unusual at all for some annuals or seeds to survive the winter and come up in the spring. We were excited that, perhaps, we might get some "freebies" and not have to plant any. So we didn't buy any to put in the flowerbed. 

We watered them and watched with anticipation as the plants grew taller and taller. They were lush green and thriving so we transplanted some to other areas of the flower bed. This would save a lot of time planting the seeds and waiting for them to come up.

We waited and waited. The plants looked healthy as they kept getting taller but no buds showed. Then next to one of the many we transplanted, we noticed a smaller plant. That one was also growing and thriving but had a couple of little yellow flower buds forming. Quite puzzled, we took a picture of one that did not have buds and searched for it online.

Well, I am so embarrassed to admit this, but it turned out to be ragweed. Ragweed, not marigold! And we transplanted several! Needless to say, we uprooted and tossed them. The only consolation in this is that apparently, there are others out there who have had the same confusion which is why sites like The Spruce or Reddit have had articles and discussions about it.

 

After we were done laughing at ourselves, I thought to myself, 'How often in life do we confuse the weeds with the real thing? What's the difference?' I'm not talking about actual weeds and plants in flowerbeds. I'm thinking about situations in life.

Sometimes, like with weeds, people can confuse a bad situation with what a real healthy situation should be. Other times, I think some choose "weeds" on purpose since uprooting and replanting takes so much effort and time. The thinking is that green things are growing rather than empty gardens.

Other times though, we make decisions where we think that metaphorically, it's just one or two small "weeds" that won't harm the garden. But what weeds do not multiply, or just die out on their own? None. Instead, they multiply and invade and can take over a garden if not plucked out.

An inflated resume leads to a small fudge on an expense report, leading to an "adjustment" on the sales report or tax return.

Friendly Zoom chat messages with a co-worker of the opposite sex lead to sharing very personal details which leads to an affair.

These are just two examples but you get the point. Once we let the weeds into the garden, they take over.

Know this: The enemy of our souls, Satan, is the father of lies. He is out to steal, kill, and destroy our lives. (John 10:10a) He makes sin look really attractive like the green, lush, thriving ragweeds growing next to the one smaller marigold. He tries to make us believe that we don't have to settle for just the one budding marigold when we can have many growing thriving ragweeds. And if we have allergies to the ragweeds, he will justify that there are remedies for the allergy symptoms.

Friends, "be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour." 1 Peter 5:8

Contrapositively, Jesus said, "I am the gate; whoever enters through Me will be saved. They will come in and go out, and find pasture. The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full." John 10:9-10

By the way, here is what our one marigold plant looks like now.

Mat Friends

Luke 5: 17-19 One day Jesus was teaching, and Pharisees and teachers of the law were sitting there. They had come from every village of Galilee and from Judea and Jerusalem. And the power of the Lord was with Jesus to heal the sick. Some men came carrying a paralyzed man on a mat and tried to take him into the house to lay him before Jesus. When they could not find a way to do this because of the crowd, they went up on the roof and lowered him on his mat through the tiles into the middle of the crowd, right in front of Jesus. 

I think about the friends in this story each time I read it. True friends are there for each other and provide support, trust, and help expecting nothing in return. I marvel at their love, commitment, and proactive decisions for their friend--the man on the mat. I wonder about the thought process that led them to do something as drastic as cutting an opening in the roof.

For some years now, I have categorized this type of friends as "mat friends" and since their names were not mentioned in the text, I have called them just that--Mat Friends. They were willing to carry their friend on a mat and did whatever it took to present him to Jesus, the only One who could heal him. There are several characteristics of these Mat Friends I admire.

Intentional. We all have busy lives and it's easy for us today to send a text and ask how someone is doing. But life over 2000 years ago was much busier since they didn't have modern-day conveniences. We don't know where the paralytic lived compared to where Jesus was, or where the Mat Friends lived. We know there were no cars at the time and people walked or rode on certain animals to get places. The Mat Friends were intentional. They didn't just say, "We probably should take our friend to see Jesus sometime." or "Let's hope Jesus comes near our friend's house so we can ask Him to stop in and heal our friend." They planned it, and they did it and I'm sure it took tremendous effort to carry their friend on a mat to where Jesus was. 

Persistent & Strategic. The room was full, and the people probably spilled out the door. When there seemed to be no way in because of the crowd, the Mat Friends did not just give up and say, "Ah... too many people! Maybe we could bring him back another time." The text above says that there were religious leaders there. The friends could have said, "Well, the religious leaders are here. They can pray over him or they can present him to Jesus. It's part of their job." but they didn't! The Mat Friends pressed forward and strategized, probably trying to think "outside the box" on how they could bring their friend in front of Jesus so the friend could be healed. I'd say cutting an opening in the roof is really outside the box of your normal way of squeezing in through the entry doors!

Faith-ful. In subsequent verses, it said that Jesus saw their faith and forgave their sins. And, He healed their friend so that he could walk! It was their tremendous faith fully in Jesus as God that led them to do all the things they did. Otherwise, if He was just a good teacher, why go through the trouble.

Mat Friends--The type of friends who would do anything for you.

I aspire to be like the Mat Friends. However, I'm just going to be transparent and say that it has been hit or miss for me. I try to be whenever I can. With two separate friends, I once offered for them to call me even if it was in the middle of the night as both were struggling with some things with their respective husbands. Both took me up on the offer, and thankfully, they were not on the same day. One called one evening around 11:30 PM. We talked for about two hours. The other on a different day called at 10:00 PM to see if I could come over which I did. If you knew me well, you'd know I love my sleep, but--you know what?--I was fine and glad to be a "shoulder" for them to cry on and to be available to pray with them.

Recently I was on the receiving end of love, support, and help from my Mat Friends. In a two-week period, I had two lung surgeries back to back. I tell you--it is not for wimps. I don't know how I made it on the surgery list because I am a wimp when it comes to pain :)

The husband of a couple with whom we are friends drove up to the hospital in the crazy DC rush hour traffic just to sit with my husband and to pray with him during my surgery. You couldn't pay me enough to drive in the crazy traffic! Mat Friend

There were local friends, friends across the country, and people in my bronchiectasis support group who lifted me up to Jesus in prayer, like the friends in the passage who carried their friend on the mat to Jesus. They didn't just pray once when they learned about my surgeries. They followed up for exact dates and times. They followed up the day before. They followed up the day of. They prayed during my surgery. There were people in every time zone in the U.S. who were praying as well as people around the world. There were people praying for me whom I've never met and most likely never will! And then there were the delicious meals, homemade baked goods, beautiful flowers, and notes & cards. Mat Friends

My husband (my Mr. Wonderful) at times during this recovery period cared for me even better than some of the nurses. (And I had wonderful nurses!) Our adult children and daughter-in-law have for years "carried me" to Jesus in their prayers on a regular basis, and have done other acts of love characteristic to Mat Friends. Other relatives prayed and checked in regularly. One came to stay with me a few days after my second surgery to help with basic things around the house. This was a big deal as she did not love driving on the interstate with semi trucks at 70mph! Mat Friends

I am blessed beyond measure and extremely thankful, first to the Lord, and second, for my Mat Friends! May the Lord be glorified for my healing and recovery!

He Knows

As I write this, I am one week+ away from checking in to the hospital for lung surgery. If you are reading this blog post for the first time, and want to know what's going on with my lungs, read my blog titled My Rescue Story. 

People have asked how I felt about such a major surgery. In general, I am at peace about it. Sure, I have had moments where my thoughts get the better of me, or I get impatient with the wait. Medical advances merging with technology result in much better procedures and recovery time today compared to that of even just 10 years ago. While that's good to know, the main reason I am at peace is not because of that. Along with everything that happened in My Rescue Story, I want to share something that happened a little over a year ago that is another great reminder for me during this time.

One day, I started to feel run down. I thought I simply had a cold, but then the mild chills set in and the low-grade fever began. This went on for a few days. I've struggled with worse things before like lung infections. But for some reason, during those days, as I did my lung treatment and prayed, which is what I usually do, I just wondered if God cared about me.

What?!?!

I have never wondered about that before. I didn't know why I would think such a thing because He had shown up many times in the past, and been actively working in my life since my mid-20's! Just a side note here: Whenever you have thoughts that are contradictory to what the Scriptures say about God, His love, or His instructions, you need to STOP! Stop and recognize that it is from your invisible enemy, Satan, who is a thief and a liar and wants nothing more than to destroy your life. Then, combat the thought with God's Word and dismiss it (the thought) as false based on who He is, and all that the Lord has blessed you with in your life.

Well, hindsight is always 20/20, right? I did not do that at the time! However, God my Creator who knows everything about me is amazing! He sent a cute little bird right up to the kitchen window. I love birds! It stood there and just looked at me for a long while before flying off. The Lord then reminded me that He cares even for the sparrows, so how much more He cares for me, and reminded me of Matthew 10:29-31 "Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? Yet not one of them will fall to the ground outside your Father's care. And even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. So don't be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows."

I don't think that bird coming up to my kitchen window was a coincidence. Birds as with other animals go to where there's a food source or where they can create a habitat. Below my kitchen window are pavers that lead to the steps to our patio area with more pavers--no plants, no shrubs, and no grass and therefore no worms or bugs for birds. And we don't make it a habit of throwing food out the window for animals--haha :) The bird was God-sent!

Then as I spent most of the day on the couch with the heater next to me to warm me up from the chills, I was on Facebook for a little bit. I saw a friend posted a picture of a board she created. This was part of the board. (Thank you SS!)

Out of all the Facebook posts, many times of which I don't see because I'm not on it long enough, the Lord brought this into my view that day. It was exactly what I needed especially Psalm 112:7 right in the middle! I don't think it was a coincidence, but a God-incidence!

I think that fear got to me. I think I feared that those symptoms would then lead me down the path to a lung infection. I didn't realize this until our wonderful daughter-in-law asked me if that was what was going through my head. I realized then that's what it was. The following Sunday was the start of the series Faith Over Fear. The message was such a good reminder to me that fear is not an emotion but a spirit, and among other things said, I felt like God was speaking directly to me. That also was NOT a coincidence.

So back to how I feel about the surgery... While any major surgery has risks, I am not fearful. I choose not to live in fear because I know my God has this! He who created me saw my unformed body in my mother's womb (Psalm 139:13-16), and has numbered the hairs on my head, He knows about this surgery. I am His. He loves me and I hold onto Him and His Word for strength. I'm not perfect at it, but He gave me this verse a few years ago: Isaiah 43:1-2 "... this is what the Lord says--He who created you... he who formed you... 'Do not fear for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned...'" The Lord is with us through challenges in life.

If you are struggling with something, I hope this has encouraged you. If you have a personal relationship with Jesus, look to Him. He knows what you are going through and He is there for you. Do you know Him? I would love to tell you about how much Jesus loves you.  Feel free to reach out to me if you don't or if you need some encouragement and prayers.

Day + Night

 A couple of weeks ago, one of my daily devotionals led me to the passage below from the Old Testament when God led the Israelites out of bondage to Pharoah, and out of Egypt. For some reason I thought about this a lot since. Today, we may not be in bondage to a ruler, but we sometimes have hard struggles, and some people are in bondage to certain addictions. The Lord revealed some things to me about this passage and I wanted to encourage you to reflect on your own situations as you enter into the new year. And take hope in the God who cares for you.

Exodus 13:17-18, 20-22 NIV

17 "When Pharaoh let the people go, God did not lead them on the road through the Philistine country, though that was shorter. For God said, If they face war, they might change their minds and return to Egypt."

18 "So God led the people around by the desert road toward the Red Sea. The Israelites went up out of Egypt ready for battle."

Reflection: Just going to be honest and real here. I don't know about you, but many times I get impatient waiting for God to answer my prayers. Some things in our society work quickly like fast food, 5G, and now AI, we want things and answers immediately. The same goes for our prayer life: we want God to answer now--like, today! However, I believe that just as God did not lead the Israelites on the shorter route to spare them from possible war, He sometimes leads us on the longer route to spare us from something only He knows about. We also develop our perseverance "muscle" when we have to deal with a situation for a longer time. Better yet, we see God at work in our own lives or those around us through our circumstances over time that we would have missed out on seeing if God were to answer our prayers immediately. In my last blog post, I chronicled how the Lord worked in my personal struggle and how that affected others the last 6-7 years. 

20-22 "After leaving Sukkoth they camped at Etham on the edge of the desert. By day, the Lord went ahead of them in a pillar of cloud to guide them on their way and by night in a pillar of fire to give them light, so that they could travel by day or night. Neither the pillar of cloud by day nor the pillar of fire by night left its place in front of the people."

Reflection: "...the Lord went ahead of them..." God knows the way of our life and our future. He knows our every need and what gives us joy. We need to trust Him to guide and lead us rather than take matters into our own hands. Again, I reference my last blog post in regards to what happened in the hospital in 2021. I could have walked out, but I would have missed out on the joy when the Lord made it known to me the reason for the delays. He wanted me to know He was at work even when I couldn't see.

"...By day, the Lord went ahead of them in a pillar of cloud to guide them on their way and by night in a pillar of fire to give them light..." Speaking of not being able to see... God probably knew by now that the Israelites are more than tired. They've been in bondage to Pharaoh, and have gone through a lot--for years! Even though they saw all the miraculous signs He performed, I'm thinking that He wanted to help them to continue to know He was still with them by being in the pillar of cloud by day and a pillar of fire by night. I thought about the cloud and the fire part as well. We may see a cloud or fog by day but it isn't quite prominent. We become aware of it, but not consciously aware of it, even as we know it's there. But a fire at night is something that we can't miss. (Fun fact: According to physicsworld.com, the human eye can see a candle about 1.5 miles away in the dark.) If we can see a candle from that far away, how much more we would notice a fire! When life circumstances are "dark" and we seek Him, we can see the Lord at work like a blazing fire, and He gives us the "warmth" or the peace of knowing He is near.

We just celebrated Christmas and sang (or heard) songs about Emmanuel. It means "God with us". How is He with us today when we haven't seen Him in a pillar of cloud or a pillar of fire? He is with us through His Holy Spirit. If you did not grow up knowing about the reason for the Christmas celebration like it was for me until my early 20's, it is not just about a baby being born in a manger. It is God Himself coming to Earth in fleshly form so He could identify with us in bodily form, as well as establish His kingdom on Earth. This is how we can trust in Jesus to help us with our struggles because He experienced all our situations and feelings, yet did not sin. And He died on the cross so that our sins could be forgiven, but was resurrected because He is God and He triumphed over something as final as death. When He left He sent His Holy Spirit to live in those who have acknowledged their own sin, turned away from it, and accepted Him as Lord & Savior of their lives.

Do you have struggles? Do you lack joy? Are you in bondage to sin or addiction? Commit your life to Jesus and turn away from self. If you have already done so, allow Him to lead you as He did the Israelites. And when "the road" seems long, far, or dark, continue to talk to Him, lean into Him, and know that He is actively at work even when you cannot see it.