Many years ago, I made a career switch from business to teaching. I switched so that I could have the same schedule as my kids since I did not want them home alone in the summertime. Once they were in college, I switched back to the business environment, but I retained a strategy that I developed during my years of teaching which helps me in one particular area of my life.
I was a specialty teacher and had taught various elementary grades, but mainly second- and third-graders. Since I was a specialty teacher, my focus was primarily on math and reading/writing remediation. My students and I did a lot of writing revisions. The process involved having students read what they wrote, re-read, and make corrections. When discussing suggestions for change, many students immediately went about making the corrections. Others, however, just sat there and looked at me. I had to tell them to erase the old word (or sentence), and replace it with the correct one. Thus, I started using the phrase "erase and replace" repeatedly whenever I got the deer-in-the-headlights look from students.
What I frequently told my students about erase and replace, I incorporated into my personal life. Yes, I do that when I write, :) but I'm not talking about writing here. What I am referring to is my thought process.
I don't know about you, but at times, I struggle with negative thoughts. They come at times when I least expect them – times when I’m in the middle of doing mundane things around the house like cooking or laundry. These unwelcomed thoughts invade my mind. They always feel like a dark cloud over me and make me feel tense. Then, this negativity about people or situations tends to take me in a downward spiral where bad thoughts pile on to more bad thoughts. The end result is I feel worse and worse. To combat this, I devised a plan.
It involves implementing what I told students in the classroom – erase and replace – except this has to do with negative thoughts. Philippians 4:8 says, "...whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable. If anything is excellent or praiseworthy, think about such things." When a negative thought comes into my mind, I erase it and replace it with a positive one finding something positive about the person or situation.
If for some reason I cannot think of anything positive, which rarely ever happens, I think of each adjective described in Phil 4:8: true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent, or praiseworthy. Beginning with the first on this list, I think of something that is true such as it's true the sun always rises and always sets. Another thing that's true is God loves me. Next, another word on the list – lovely. What is lovely? Flowers are lovely, and I visualize or look at the beautiful flowers in my garden. I do this for each word. By the time I'm finished with the list of things to think about in this verse, my negative thoughts are gone.
Even the most positive person on Earth struggles with this every once in a while if we are honest with ourselves. Nevertheless, we do not have to be controlled or consumed by it. We combat it with Truth, and the verse above is God's Truth. Whenever Truth is presented, darkness flees.
I am not advocating sweeping things under the rug by erasing and replacing. If there have been hurts or misunderstandings in interpersonal relationships that cause negative thoughts or feelings, we need to do more. We need to figure out the underlying unresolved problems. In cases like this, another thing I do is pray, pray, and pray some more about an opportunity to talk to the person to get it resolved. I also realize some people are not as approachable as others. The best we can do is try. If the person is not open to it, we need to realize that reconciliation may not be possible. This is when forgiveness comes in. It's not easy, but it gives us peace in our minds and hearts. And God is faithful. When we pray for the ability to forgive, He helps us to do just that.
